September13

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Scriptures:

2 Corinthians 5:21 NKJV

For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.

Ephesians 4:29 NKJV

Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.

NOTE: Would you take time to intentionally build your spouse up with words today

Couples Devotion – September13

September 13

In Christ, God sees us as righteous, holy, and beautiful (2 Corinthians 5:21)…. Jesus has the ability to overcome everything anyone has ever said about or to you. Sometimes your spouse points you directly to Jesus’s love. Sometimes your spouse’s affirmation stimulates us to more fully believe and accept the love we have in Christ. So, more than any other human relationship, marriage has a unique power to heal all hurts and convince us of our own distinctive beauty and worth. (Hardcover, p. 149; paperback, pp. 164-65)

THE POETRY OF THE HEART. Certainly the primary relationship of love we need is with God. But remember that though Adam was sinless, there was an emptiness that a relationship with God alone could not satisfy, a need for human love that the Creator had put into him. When Adam looks at Eve for the first time, he says, in the first poetry in the Bible: “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh” (Genesis 2:23). This was at the same time a covenant commitment as well as an explosive outburst of lyrical joy for her. The power of our spouse to give us a Christ like approval and healing love is vividly foreshadowed here. Know the power you have to build up your partner.

Reflection: Discuss with your spouse an additional place in your life (see yesterday’s devotional) where you need his or her encouragement and affirmation more.

Thought for prayer: Ask God to keep you from being too busy, tired, and distracted to accomplish one of your main callings in life-the edification of your spouse in love. Ask him of her to help you keep this in the forefront of your mind and attention.

Reference: The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy and Kathy Keller.

September12

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Scriptures

1 John 3:2 NKJV

Beloved, now we are children of God; and it has not yet been revealed what we shall be, but we know that when He is revealed, we shall be like Him, for we shall see Him as He is.

2 Peter 3:18 NKJV

18 but grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

To Him be the glory both now and forever. Amen.

Proverbs 15:1 NKJV

A soft answer turns away wrath,

But a harsh word stirs up anger

COUPLE DEVOTION – September 12

September 12

And if, over the years, you have grown to love and admire your spouse more and more, then his or her praise will get more and more strengthening and healing. As Faramir says to Sam Gamgee in The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers: “The praise of the praiseworthy is above all rewards.” To be highly esteemed by someone you highly esteem is the greatest thing in the world.

ADORED BY THE ADORED. One reason that we find spouses’ affirmation so powerful is that they know us. Here is a second reason: a compliment from an admirable person is always more uplifting than approval from a person you don’t respect. You marry a person that you admire, and so right from the start his or her approval means a lot. But as the years go by, if you both grow in grace and Christ-like character and you come to admire and adore your spouse more and more, then the effect of any praise from the other becomes transformative.

To be adored by someone you adore is like heaven. And that is what heaven will be like (1 John 3:2).

Reflection: Discuss with your spouse the place in your life where you need his or her encouragement and affirmation more.

Thought for reflection: Realizing that your power to bless

and build up your spouse depends in part on his or her respect for your growth and character. Ask God to help you grow in grace 2 Peter 3:18) so your ability to affirm and bless your spouse will have the greatest effect.

Reference: The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy and Kathy Keller.

september11

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Scriptures

Proverbs 16:24 (ESV)Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.
Matthew 12:36-37 (ESV)I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, 37 for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”
Proverbs 10:11 (ESV)The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.

COUPLE DEVOTION – September 11

The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy K and Kathy K

September 11

Because marriage… brings you into the closest possible contact, a positive assessment by your spouse has ultimate credibility. If someone I know a little comes up to me and says, “You are one of the kindest men I know,” I will certainly feel complimented and pleased. But… he doesn’t really know me…. But if my wife, after years of living with me, says, “You are one of the kindest men I know,” … that affirmation is profoundly comforting… because she knows me better than anyone.

THE PENULTIMATE SOLUTION

A spouse’s uniquely intimate knowledge can and often does lead to painful critique and conflict. But when he or she, despite seeing all that is wrong with you, nevertheless praises and affirms you, the effect is powerful. Criticism always stays with us longer than commendations. Why? All human beings have a primordial sense that we are not what we should be (cf. Genesis 3:7). It is not easy to overcome that baseline sense of shame. Yet spouses can do it, because when they compliment you, they do it with full knowledge of your flaws. When the thoughtful, sincere praise comes, deep down you can’t help but think something like, “If she says that, I guess it’s true.”

Reflection: Think of other reasons that the testimony of your spouse to your gifts and growth is so formative and powerful,

Thought for prayer: In each other’s presence, thank God for the ways that the affirmation of the other has comforted you deeply, and ask God for the ability to use well and wisely your power to bless the other.

Reference: The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy and Kathy Keller.